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Friday, March 1, 2024

It began with cows, it will end with people

By: Borut Korun

Dr Žiga Turk, one of our observers of social events in Slovenia, made this prediction, and we can only agree with it.

This time, it was about cows. They were taken away because they were not cleaned like the clean pets of those urban utopians who never worked, let alone worked on the land, and least of all with livestock.

As we could see in the footage, the cows were well cared for. Therefore, the accusation that they were poorly treated does not hold. Secondly, the cows did not live cramped in a dark barn; they lived outdoors. However, it is clear that cows trample moist ground into mud in a very short time. Let one of those ladies who now govern us put on red heels and go to a meadow where a considerable number of cows graze to see what colour her shoes will be afterward.

But the report of that non-governmental female being who participated in the seizure of livestock sounded like delusions, and the author would rather be judged in some specialised medical institution because she allegedly fell in love with one of the cows. She “heard” how this gentle cow soul begged her to take her along. Take me, take me, her big gentle eyes supposedly said. But maybe not everything is as crazy as it sounds because that lady has already claimed the cow, justifying the appropriation by saying that the animal actually asked her for it.

Slovenia, or rather its leading elite, is becoming – to put it mildly – a ship of entertaining eccentrics. We have a government ministerial group that adopts a law, only for one of them to later declare that the law is not feasible. We can laugh when a woman communicates with a cow in the manner described; we may be annoyed when a minister writes a book that includes instructions on how to lick one’s behind. We laughed when they told us how we would dance; we laughed when the president of the parliament truly “danced” upon arriving at the celebration venue, forgetting that she was there for her official role, not because of the erotic signals she emits.

We laughed when two blondes in Uganda – one with torn pants like a teenager – pursued a feminist foreign policy by adopting a female monkey, giving it one of their names without considering the potential associations such adoption and naming might evoke. We laugh when we get the main dancer in this country with a somewhat Prešeren-esque hairstyle, and then we laugh again when his lover sends him to the hairdresser. It is amusing when they step into the public eye, and she holds onto him as if he were trying to escape. It is also funny that when you lose a vote in the National Assembly, you blame cosmic disturbances for it.

In reality, we should reflect.

Funny eccentrics can also be dangerous. Let’s recall the eccentric Roman Emperor Nero, who set fire to Rome to find inspiration for his poetry. Or someone else in his position who brought his horse to the Roman Senate and declared it a senator. Members of that venerable institution probably bit their lips to refrain from laughing, but laughter could have come at a high cost. When humour no longer serves the purpose of entertainment and strives to be serious, the amusement stops. The circus we watch, and experience is becoming grotesque.

When our authorities eject people from their jobs and ruthlessly settle scores even among themselves, it is no longer amusing. Even less so when they open doors to migrants. When their absurd ideas gain legal value. When the prime minister expresses support for his minister, and the next day, the same minister has to sign a resignation letter. When they no longer heed the laws, and spoken words carry no weight. When they seize a farmer’s herd of cows, and the proceeds will be shared among non-governmental organisations. Then you sense where we are sliding – into their not at all amusing totalitarianism. Into a state where robbery becomes a reward, as in the case of the unlawful seizure of the cattle herd. All in the style of the Slovenian song: what can they do to us! The only hope remains that at least the second part of Turk’s prediction will not come true.

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